The Prodigal Son-Lessons Learned

 

The Prodigal Son-Lesson Learned

The story of the Prodigal Son holds so much meaning for me. When I was a younger, I found myself wasting money and living riotously. I was working as a nurse and making decent money. However, I did not have the money management skills I needed to survive my first experience with life on my own. It wasn’t long before I found myself broke, out of work, and living in a way that was contrary to my Christian upbringing.

One day, it came to me. Why was I living like this? Why was I lying around the house hungry and wondering where my next meal was coming from when I could simply get in my car and drive home? So, I tucked my tail between my legs and went back home to my mother’s house.

When I look back on my life, I realized that I had become like the prodigal son. I had thought that I knew everything. I had rushed to leave home and do things on my own. I had landed a great job that I didn’t appreciate. I had not learned to budget, so I had blown my money on parties, clubs, and things I didn’t need.

And, now, I have watched my oldest son do the same thing. He had a great job. He made good money, but he didn’t plan for the future. He didn’t think about the next day. He didn’t save any money. He spend all of his funds on wasteful ventures and “so-called” friends. When I think about what he has thrown away, I get angry. He should have known better. I had tried to teach him to budget and how to save money, but it had all fallen on deaf ears.

Then, I remember myself. I remember how I also wasted my money, my time, and my loyalty on worthless friends. I remember me, and then I forgive.

I can forgive my son’s stupidity because God and my mother forgave me. When I was in the hog pen of life and sinking in despair, God nudged me and said “Go back home to your mother’s house.” Thankfully, I went in time. And, just like the prodigal son, I was not met with anger or scorn. I was met with love and understanding.

So, as I look at my son, I remember and I forgive. I remember how merciful our God is. I remember that Christ went to the cross was my sins. What great lesson in love is there than this?

If I knew Then...

How many times have we all said this? Too many. As I was driving down the road the other morning, I couldn’t help but thinking about all of the times that I had faced adversity. I was thinking about the problems I had faced and the way that I had responded to them. Suddenly, it came to me. If I had just responded the right way, things would have gone different. If I had just turned to God sooner!

I knew how to pray at the time of the adversity. But, did I ask God show me how to respond to the problem? Did I ask him to lead me around the mountain instead of trying to trek over it?

I am just so thankful that I now have a better understanding of who I am in Christ. I know that as a child of God I have a right to take my problems to the throne and expect them to be answered. I have the assurance that God hears me and that he is working everything for my good. I have learned to accept that adversities will come, but I don’t have to react negatively. I don’t have to stress out. I should take my problems~my questions to God immediately instead of trying to figure things out myself.

Yes, it can be trying during the waiting time. But, it is so much better to wait for God to give me the answer. It is better to allow him to guide me.

I used to get frustrated when I talked to someone about my problems and all he/she could tell me to do was to “pray”. I remember thinking, “Yeah, right. I know how to pray. I tried that already.” I now realize that although I had prayed, I did not give God time to answer. If an answer did not come immediately, I thought that God was ignoring me or that he just didn’t care about my problem. I can see now that he did care. I can see that he heard me when I first prayed. Just like with Daniel, he sent the answer, but sometimes it is held up.

If I knew then what I know now, I would not have spent so many sleepless nights. I would not have worried so much. I would have responded better. I would have guarded my tongue. I would have fasted more. I would have looked with spiritual eyes and seen the army of the Lord. I would have remembered that the battle was not mine but God’s.

Thank God for lessons learned!

Careless Words: We Must Learn to Bridle Our Tongues

Careless Words

It is amazing how much we can learn about God from children. As I watch my students each day, I learn so many lessons from them until it is almost mindboggling. Just the other day I learned 2 valuable ones from one of my students. This is the first one. Careless words can hurt and they can destroy.

I know you are probably thinking that we all know that. True. But, it is still a lesson worth repeating. Children don’t seem to realize that the little thing in their mouths called a tongue can get them into a world of trouble. The Bible says in James 3: 4-7: Look at the ships also, though they are so great and are driven by strong winds, are still directed by a very small rudder wherever the inclination of the pilot desires. 5So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire! 6And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell.…

One of my students learned this lesson after she decided to announce to the class how much she wished I would go away. This little announcement came as the result of my correcting her inappropriate behavior. Once the words were out of her mouth, the write up slip was filled out and sent to the principal’s office. Next, the call was made to her coach and to her parent. In the end, she was severely punished for not controlling her tongue.

Yes, we all get angry. Yes, we all think evil thoughts at times. Sometimes those evil thoughts are about our boss, our co-workers, our fellow church members, and even our spouses. However, we don’t just say these things out loud. If we did, it could have disastrous results. We could lose our jobs, our spouses, and our places in society. There are so many marriages and relationships that have been brought to ruins over careless words~careless whispers. So, what do we do?

First, as Christians, we learn to bridle our tongues. We pray and ask God to help us when our boss or our spouse or our co-worker is getting on our last nerves. We ask him to show us why we don’t like our neighbors. You would be surprised at the answer.

This brings me to the second thing we must do: Pray. Several years ago there was a nurse that I worked with. Without knowing why, I talked about her negatively all the time. I was constantly pointing out her faults and talking down about her to my family and friends. One day, this question popped into my head: “Why does this woman irritated you so much?” I stopped and gave this question some serious thought. Then, the answer came to me.

 I didn’t like this young woman because I was jealous of her. I was jealous of the fact that she didn’t have children and could do whatever she wanted whenever she wanted. I had a small child, and my activities centered around caring for him. I was jealous of the fact that she had more money left over after she paid her bills. I was jealous of the fact that her parents had bought her a car, and my parents had not been able to do the same for me. I had had to purchase my own car and pay my own bills. Yes, I was jealous.

Once this reality came to me, I learned to control my tongue, and I stopped talking about her. I prayed and God showed me that I also had many things to be thankful for.

The tongue is such a dangerous thing. It can lead us to success or it can lead us to death. We must learn to choose our words wisely.

The Sound of Your Footsteps: Thunder is Coming

 

Thunder and lightning raced across the sky yesterday, and my poor students were scared stiff. The lights were blinking on and off, and my students demanded that I go ahead and cut them off. They also wanted me to close the blinds (which isn’t possible, by the way) and be very quiet. Although his was kind of funny, I could understand their fear. I had also been taught to be very quiet when “God was doing his business”. But, what I thought about when all of this was happening was how God can turn our footsteps into thunder.

There is a story in the Bible in 2 Kings Chapter 7 that tells of four lepers. They were sitting outside the city. There was an army coming. So, they reasoned with themselves saying, “Why do we sit here until we die?  "If we say, 'We will enter the city,' then the famine is in the city and we will die there; and if we sit here, we die also. Now therefore come, and let us go over to the camp of the Syrians. If they spare us, we will live; and if they kill us, we will but die.” These men got up and went walking toward the enemy’s camp and sure death. But, a strange and wonderful thing happened while they were on their way. The Lord magnified their footsteps and the arm of Syrians thought that a great multitude was coming up against them. So, army quickly fled. When the lepers entered the camp, there were no soldiers there only all of the rich that the army had left behind. God had multiplied their footsteps. God had given their footsteps the sound of thunder.

I am so glad that when I face trouble or adversity God had given me the sound of thunder. My very footsteps can cause my enemies to flee. Although they may come up against me like a flood, they shall not prosper. I am a king’s kid. I have the power to tread upon serpents and scorpions and over all the power of the enemy.

Get ready for thunder!

2 Kings 7:3-9

Flowers on the Floor: Learning to Let Go of Painful Relationships

 

It is amazing how many women are hurting because of the things that a man has done. And, don’t get me wrong. I have not been an exception. We have all been in love with someone who just didn’t seem to appreciate us or recognize our value.

Summer comes with a wide variety of beautiful flowers. There are daisies, black-eyed susans, magnolia blooms, lilies, violets, and baby’s breath just to name a few. These flowers are beautiful, but they become ugly and stink once they have been crushed. When I think of the way we are once someone has hurt us, I think of flowers on the floor. I think of beautiful flowers that have been crushed underneath some uncaring person’s foot. This person did not stop to see the beauty of the flower. He only hurried about his business. And, so many times, he never looks back to see what he has done or who he has hurt. We have cast pearls before swine.

We must learn how to identify swine. We must learn how to get out of the hog pen and move forward. Yes, he may have talked good in the beginning. Maybe he was great in the beginning, but that time has passed. You have lost your value to him. And, no amount of crying or begging will get him to change his mind. So, stop throwing your pearls to him. Stop offering up yourself on his bed on sacrifice thinking that if I just give him more love, more sex, or more money he will love me again. He won’t. He will enjoy the sex. He will use your money. But, he will never see the pearls. He will never realize how much you are giving up just for him.

Yes, one day he may come to himself. But, dear sister, that day is not today. He is no longer your Romeo. He is not your Superman. He is now your abuser. He is verbally abusive. He is emotionally unavailable. He forgets your birthday, anniversary, or other important dates. He would rather hang out with his friends or the new chick he just met. You know the one who is turning him on for the moment. Believe me. It is just for the moment. So, what do you do?

Stop answering his calls or texts. Stop giving him sex whenever he wants it. Move out of his house or put him out of yours. Pick up your pearls~your beautiful flowers~move forward. Give the pain and hurt to God. He can heal you. A real man loves God and is obedient to his word. And, if he loves God, he will treat you like the princess (remember you are a king’s kid) that you are.

Matthew 7: 6

God Is Our CTRL, ALT, Delete

 

CTRL, ALT, Delete

The other day I was working on my desktop computer, and it started to act up. I thought to myself, “Okay, another virus”. I watched the little circle go around, and around, and around. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to purchase a new one right now, and I still had pictures from my photo business saved on it. It is also the one I use to do my printing and pictures. I said, “God, if this thing would just stop long enough for me to savage my photos”.

Then, it came to me. Press CTRL, ALT, Delete. I wondered what that would do, but I followed the prompting in my spirit. I pressed the buttons. The computer instantly stopped doing what it was doing and went back to working as normal. I looked at the computer and realized that God is like the CTRL, ALT, Delete buttons. He is in control even when we aren’t. He knows how to bring things back in line and create order where there is chaos. While we are trying so hard to figure things out, God already has the answer. He knows the ending from the beginning.

I know it is hard sometimes to let God have his way. Well, it is for me. We want to control everything. We want to be in charge of our lives. We think we know what is best for us, but we don’t. We don’t know the things that God knows. He has searched the heart of man. He knows there every thought.

So, stop trying to control everything. Give it to God. He knows how to fix our broken dreams and mend our hurts. He knows how to bring safety and security in the mist of the storms in your life. Trust in him and lean not to your own understanding. Stop staring at the computer screen wondering what to do. Call on God and He will answer you. He will bear you up lest you dash your foot against a rock.

 

Proverbs 3: 5

Psalms 91: 15

Jeremiah 33:3

Isaiah 65:24

Learning How to Submit to God

 

It is my belief that submission and black women don’t easily mix. I say this because I am a black woman, and I know how hard it is to submit. This is especially true for single black women. This submission can be to a man, to God, or to our bosses. It is hard. Why?

Submission means to surrender our will to the authority of another. It means giving up what we want to do the will of another. And, for some African American women like myself this is so difficult. It is difficult for me because I have been single all my life. As a result, I have had to learn how to think for myself and for my children.  I have had to make all of the hard decision, to go the tire shop and bargain for tires, and to the car lot and try to get a good deal even though I knew the odds were against me. There was no man to do this for me.

So, when you ask an independent woman to lay down all those years of training~to give up doing what she sees as best in order to service God or to be obedient to a husband~you are almost expecting a miracle. But, thank God for miracles.

It has taken me all these years to see that my way is not always right. As God said, His ways are not my ways and His thoughts are not my thoughts. He knows what I don’t know and he sees what I don’t see. I have had to remember this when things don’t go my way, when I don’t get the car I want, or the man I believe is just the one for me. I have to remember this when my job is not going as I would like and I think about giving up. I have to remember this instead of running away from the job, the problem, or the circumstance. I have to stop focusing on myself and focus on God and his wisdom. He knows the end results. He sees that man’s heart. He knows why I am at the job I am at and why. Nothing happens by accident. All things work toward the good of those that love the Lord and are called according to his purpose. God knows.

So, I am learning that instead of struggling or having one of my temper tantrums to trust God. I am learning to say “It is okay. I will obey.”

It is my belief that this is the reason God allowed me to be single for so long. In all honesty, if I had married before now, I am sure it would have ended in disaster.  I had to learn to trust people. I had to learn to stop reacting negatively to situations and trying to make things work according to my own will. I had to realize that there is a higher power.

Although it is often difficult, I am learning to submit to God. I am learning to stop trying to be so independent and learn to depend on God.